Loss of a Loved one. R.I.P Robby

Everyone that knew Robby knew he loved puzzles. I was sitting at my desk on Sunday trying to write something to say but the words were hard and I was trying not to cry at work because I never know when I might get a call, but no matter how hard I tried every time I pictured Robby in my mind and hear his voice from my memory a few tears would escape and I couldn't hold them in. I ended up not being able to find the words that night but I had a puzzle piece at my desk that was a piece of a puzzle I had lost and then found and it inspired a poem that said better how I felt then all the things I had written down and scribbled out.

My heart is like a puzzle

& now a piece is gone
When I first heard you’d gone
my heart couldn't believe my head.
As the days past the truth sunk in
That my heart was no longer whole
Because you were gone. 
I can hear your voice in my head 
With your happy greeting 
& I can’t help but a tear fall from my eye. 
I know that you have peace now 
& you’re no longer in pain. 
I know that somewhere up there 
You have a piece of my heart

I grew up with Robby from the time I was about 8 when Terry and my mom got together. Robby was always there when you needed a hug, if he saw you crying or upset that was the first thing he would do is give you a bear hug and ask you what’s wrong.

I didn't get to see him while he was sick. I didn't even know he had been sick till 3 months time had passed. I let life get in the way as it had so many times before and now I wish I made the time to go even if it meant going to bed late one day. I keep thinking of the last time I saw him. Terry and Joe met me at my job to pick up some iPhone cords and Robby was in the back seat, always excited to see me he called me sissy as always. I gave him a hug then, you know the normal bear hug he always did; the one that made you gasp for air because he didn't know how strong he was, but I wish I held on a little tighter, a little longer. If only I knew it would have been the last time I seen him but we never know these things.

When we are little we dream of growing up. Getting to do what we want to do is one of the reasons, we think it will be easier. What we didn't know was as we age we must deal with loss. Loss of loved ones, loss of income, and losing love. It is those things that will shape who we are at the end of the day. I know it's hard but we must carry on with the memories of our losses to keep our loved ones alive in our hearts. Life doesn't get easier we only get wiser with age, my age has taught me to keep loved ones close because you never know when they will be gone. Rip Robby.